


Dreams of a Tea Dragon

by zazajb



Category: Torchwood
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-02
Updated: 2010-06-12
Packaged: 2018-01-09 05:06:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1141790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zazajb/pseuds/zazajb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>We don’t always realise the effects of alien tech on frail humanity!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Title: Dreams of a Tea Dragon  
Author: zazajb  
Rating: PG-13, some mild references to drugs, occasional language  
Pairings/Characters: Jack, Ianto, Owen  
Spoilers – none  
Summary: We don’t always realise the effects of alien tech on frail humanity!  
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters - just like to dabble with them from time to time

A/N Written for Dreams: challenge #1 Redisourcolour  
   
  


Dreams of a Tea Dragon

Ianto leant over. It smelled vaguely of spice...like cinnamon, he thought. It reminded him of Christmas as a child. 

It looked fairly innocuous, but he’d long since learnt that appearances were sometimes deceptive. He ran the scanner over the shell. Nothing. He touched his comm. unit, “Jack, it’s totally inert – nothing on the scanner so I’m going to box and tag it and come down...” He listened to the reply and grinned, glancing around him before responding. “Yes, the view’s lovely!”

Shaking his head, he reached out carefully and picked up the silvery shell. It was smooth and cool to the touch and heavier than it looked. He settled it into the containment box and was about to secure the top when a faint light caught his eye and he pulled the lid back off.

The shell was glowing now, almost pulsating. He ran the scanner again. It now registered off the scale. Closing the lid hurriedly, he noted the date and time on the tag and began the long climb down, cursing the idiotic alien race who’d decided that the top of an electric pylon was a good place to land.

As he climbed lower, his thoughts drifted. He was thirsty. He really wanted a cup of tea...actually, he really, really wanted a cup of tea! He climbed faster, wishing he could fly...it would be good to fly – like a bird, no, like a dragon – a big red Welsh dragon!

He jumped the last six feet and landed in a heap with his nose inches away from Jack’s boots. He thrust the box at him. “It’s gone off the scale!” he said, giggling. “Can I have a cup of tea now?”

“Ianto?”

“Yes, Jack! I want to be a dragon!” He passed out, Jack catching him before he hit the ground.

Touching his ear, Jack called Owen...

~*~*~*~*~*~

He shifted restlessly under the thin cover, mumbling to himself in his sleep. Owen leant forward to listen, managing to make out a few words. 

“Tea, need tea, got to have tea...dragons can’t fly without tea!” 

Owen grumbled loudly as he made his way to the kitchen. He was a doctor, not a bloody teaboy! It was fine for Jack to say give him anything he asked for...but tea? I don’t make tea, he huffed as he poured boiling water into the mug and stirred. He chucked a couple of spoons of sugar in as an afterthought. Tough if he doesn’t like it!

When he got back to the sofa, the teaboy was still tossing and turning uncomfortably, a frown on his pale face.

Owen laid a hand lightly on his shoulder. “I made you some tea...”

The Welshman’s eyes flew open. “Tea!” he said delighted. “I like tea!”

Owen pushed the mug into his outstretched hands and he sipped the steaming beverage appreciatively. “Tea...” he sighed.

His eyelids drooped and he sank back onto the sofa, the mug tipping dangerously in his hand. Owen rescued it before it spilled and plonked it on the floor, resuming his pacing as he watched the sleeping man shifting restlessly as he dreamt.

Ten minutes later, Jack returned. He joined Owen to stare down at the young man. “How is he?”

“Restless, keeps mumbling about tea and dragons... I made him tea – and he hasn’t drunk it! I actually made him tea and he can’t even be bothered to drink it...” he grumbled. “Did you manage to retcon the witnesses?”

Jack chuckled. “Yea, made them a cup of tea! Left them sleeping like a baby – shame we can’t do that for Ianto!”

“What happened?”

“The shell is an alien equivalent of LSD and its hallucinogenic properties were activated by the ion emissions from the pylon. He’s going to have some pretty exciting dreams until he sleeps it off! He told the electricity board contractors that he’s a magic Tea Dragon!”

“Oh, I am going to have so much fun holding this over his head!” the acerbic doctor chuckled loudly as he disappeared back down to autopsy.

Jack crouched down by the sofa and stroked Ianto’s hair softly. He opened his eyes. “Jack?”

“Hey! How are you doing? Owen made you tea..he’s a bit upset because you haven’t drunk it.”

Ianto’s face lit up. “I like tea!”

“I know!” Jack smiled. “Now, please. Sleep and dream - for me? And drink the rest of that bloody tea! “

Ianto’s eyes closed. “Tea Dragon’s like tea!” he murmured settling back down.

Jack picked up the mug and drank the murky lukewarm tea. It was disgusting! At least Owen was a better doctor than he was a teaboy! He settled on the floor with his back against the sofa, preparing for a long night watching over Ianto as he dreamt wild tales of tea and dragons. 

 

 

Due to popular demand..the sequel: Morning after...the tea before!  


 

 

 


	2. Morning after…the tea before!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ianto recovers from his alien ‘trip’ and Owen has some fun at his expense. Requested sequel to ‘Dreams of a Tea Dragon’

Title: Morning after…the tea before!  
Author: zazajb  
Rating: NC-17, adult concepts, occasional language, M/M  
Pairings/Characters: Jack/Ianto; team   
Spoilers – none. Set between TW series 2 and 3   
Summary: Ianto recovers from his alien ‘trip’ and Owen has some fun at his expense. Requested sequel to ‘Dreams of a Tea Dragon’   
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters - just like to dabble with them from time to time

Xposted to Jantolution & jackxianto

A/N Written for  ** gernumblies_fic  ** for her awesome audio of the original Dreams of a Tea Dragon.  Hope you like it J  
[Original fic here:  <http://zazajb.livejournal.com/8064.html> ]     


A/N2 If you’re not familiar with the children’s song mentioned, here’s a link to one of a dozen different versions – I like the cartoon on this one!!!   
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZuvq4Ziw34&feature=fvw](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZuvq4Ziw34&feature=fvw)

 

Morning after...the tea before

 

His eyelids fluttered and consciousness returned slowly. His eyes opened fully and he winced at the light, a groan escaping his lips as a demolition team crashed around in his head.

“Hey, you back with us..?” Jack’s voice was soft, an amused smile playing on his lips. “How’re you feeling?”

“Like I’ve done ten rounds with a weevil...my mouth is like the bottom of Myfanwy’s nest and my head...” he groaned again as he struggled into a sitting position and buried his face in his hands.

Jack sank down beside him and pulled the Welshman gently towards him, sliding his arm around his shoulders. Ianto shifted, sinking into the reassuring warmth of the embrace. 

“Here...sip it...” Jack pushed a cup into his hand. “It’s warm water with lemon juice...rehydrates you faster than anything else...” He chuckled as Ianto screwed his face up, “...oh, and it’s an acquired taste..!” He held out a small pink pill, “…one of Owen’s miracle cures…”

Jack watched as the young man popped the pill into his mouth and washed it down with the last of the lemon water, grimacing as he swallowed. He pressed a light kiss to his temple and leant back as Ianto rested his head against his Captain’s shoulder and closed his eyes.

“What happened?” he stifled a yawn. “Last thing I remember is starting to climb down that bloody pylon, thinking I was thirsty…”

“Oh, baby…” Jack chuckled, “…that’s just the start! That shell is a rechargeable form of recreational drug used by the Corahcuts – an enlightened race with very long necks – it’s charged by ion emissions, hence the electric pylon, and then activated by touch…the effects are a bit like earth LSD…”

Ianto rubbed his eyes, “Fuck!” he muttered with feeling, glancing up to see fond amusement dancing in Jack’s blue grey eyes. “What did I do?” he groaned again, “…please tell me it wasn’t too embarrassing…”

“Owen made you tea…”

Ianto sat bolt upright. “O…Ow…Owen made _me_ tea..?” he spluttered, horror and disbelief mingling. “Did I drink it? Owen’s tea’s foul…” he shuddered.

Jack grinned. “But you said Tea Dragon’s liked tea… _magic_ Tea Dragons no less…and you tried to fly off the pylon…”

“No, Jack...tell me I didn’t...” the groan was deep and heartfelt, “...Owen’s gonna milk this isn’t he..?”

“Yup!” He tipped Ianto’s face up and kissed him softly. “At least you didn’t actually _drink_ his bloody tea – that fell to me, you crashed out and he was griping that you hadn’t drunk it after he’d gone to all that effort...you owe me big time Mr Jones!” He kissed him again, tenderly cupping his cheek, feeling the younger man relax against his touch.

Pulling away gently, he stood up and tugged the Welshman to his feet. “Why don’t you go and shower, freshen up...might make you feel a bit less like a dragon with a sore head...I’ll bring you...”

“... _not tea!”_ Ianto interrupted with feeling, “I think there’s some orange juice in the fridge...”

Jack grinned sympathetically and gave him a gentle push. “Go!” He watched him walk stiffly to the office and disappear down the ladder, before heading up to the kitchen. He was pouring two glasses of juice when he heard the roller door siren. He glanced at his watch, not quite seven, early even for Tosh...

Wandering out, he gaped at Owen – this was ‘never-here-before-nine am-Owen’ – and what on earth was he carrying?

Owen was staring at the empty sofa. He swung round. “What’ve you done with the teaboy, I mean the Tea Dragon?” he grinned sardonically, shifting the box in his arms.

“He’s gone for a shower...” Jack nodded in the direction of his office.

“He’s ok, yea, after his trip?” the doctor in him asserting itself briefly.

“Yeah, a bit rumpled, you know, like he’s had a heavy night, but no real fallout other than complete loss of dignity...don’t be too unkind...” he added as Owen smirked. “What you got there?”

“’I’ll come up...” taking the stairs at a run. He went into the kitchen, Jack following, curiously. Owen pulled out strings of banners, Welsh dragons proudly displayed on each little triangle, followed by balloons, stickers and numerous eight inch fluffy Welsh dragon soft toys, each with a tea bag tied to its back with a piece of red ribbon. “Took me bloody ages to do these...but winding the teaboy up is so gonna be worth it!” he laughed. “Help me decorate, Jack, quick, before he comes up here to make coffee...”

“Where did you get all this stuff?”

“Raided the Tourist information...” 

Jack chuckled. “Ianto’s gonna be pissed if you’ve mucked up his stock..!” He picked up the glasses of juice again. “You decorate...I’ll go and delay him...”

“Oi, just remember I’m up here...no noisy shagging..!”

Jack just grinned at him and left him to his decorating. Holding the glasses with one hand he climbed swiftly down the ladder. Ianto was sat on his bed, a towel around his waist, head bowed, damp hair deliciously awry. He looked totally defeated. 

“How’s your head now?” Jack sat down next to him, holding out a glass. 

“Fine...” he muttered, taking a long drink of the juice. “That was Owen arriving...” his voice trailed off and he leant against the older man, closing his eyes. “...he’s _never_ in this early...he’s going to torture me...isn’t he..?”

Jack took the glass out of his hand and set it on the bedside table, before sinking to his knees in front of the dejected Welshman. He wrapped his arms around him, stroking the bare skin softly. He tilted his head up so he could meet the young man’s gaze. 

“Yes, that was Owen, but his first question was ‘were you ok after your trip’...then, yeah, he’s gonna have a bit of fun with you...just roll with it – I promise I won’t let him make you any more tea! Now...too much talking considering I’ve got a naked man in my arms...” 

He smiled, that only-for-Ianto-when-we’re-alone smile, and captured his lips in a gentle kiss that grew in intensity as their tongues explored each other’s mouths and they lost themselves in the moment. Numerous hot kisses later, they were both panting, Jack had somehow lost his t-shirt and they were pressed together on his tiny cot, highly aroused, writhing against each other...

Jack slid his hand down to press against Ianto’s groin, feeling him arch into the touch as he moaned against his mouth. He stroked gently, disappointed, but unsurprised when the young man broke away from their kisses to whisper “...please Jack, not while Owen’s...”

He sighed regretfully and slid off the bed. He kissed him lightly, brushing his cheek. “You get dressed and I’ll see you in my office?” He kissed him again, lingering on those soft and sensual lips that were swollen and pink from their kisses...before climbing back up into his office.

There was no sign of Owen but he could hear snatches of music coming from autopsy. The hub seemed unmolested so it appeared the kitchen was the only victim... He grinned to himself, he just adored this team of his...

When Ianto clambered up into Jack’s office, freshly suited, ten minutes later, Gwen and Tosh had just arrived, Tosh clutching several bags from their favourite bakers. Both women were giggling so it was obvious that Owen had called them. Ianto blushed as they waved at him, muttering fervently in Welsh under his breath. Jack grabbed his hand and tugged him towards the door... “...get it over with..?” he suggested.

Gripping Jack’s hand painfully tight, Ianto shrugged and allowed himself to be pulled out of the office and into the main hub.

As he approached his colleagues Owen handed them sheets of paper and turned his ipod on, filling the immediate area with guitar music as they launched into an amended version of an old children’s favourite…

_Puff the magic dragon, loved to drink his tea_

_And frolicked in the morning mist, by the bay - Cardiff city_

_Little Ianto teaboy, loved that rascal Puff_

_And bought him cakes and archive files_

_And other alien stuff!_

They dissolved into fits of giggles, clutching each other. Jack glanced at Ianto to see how the young man was taking it, relieved to see him grinning ruefully, and joining in with the chorus. He shook his head, laughing. “Love what you did with the words, Owen…” he gave the medic a playful shove.

Owen grinned back. “I got stuck after the first line…” he admitted, “…so I called Tosh and then we both called Gwen…so it was a team effort…you like it?” he looked at Ianto who was still humming the tune to himself.

“Yeah, great one…oh, and thanks for making me that _lovely_ cup of tea. Maybe you could make us all one later…” he smirked at the horrified looks on the girls’ faces – Owen’s tea was infamous and downright disgusting!!!

“No chance! I’m a doctor not a bloody teaboy! That was a once in a lifetime…”

“Thank God for that!” Gwen mouthed to Tosh behind Owen’s back, causing Jack and Ianto to laugh loudly.

“Ok, now you’ve done teasing me, coffee and those Danish Tosh’s kindly brought in?” Ianto headed up the stairs, not noticing that they all followed him…until he entered the kitchen to be greeted with Welsh Dragon banners draped from the cupboards and ceiling, stickers on the doors, worktops and _his coffee machine_ and stuffed red dragon toys each with their own individual teabag! Balloons hung from the ceiling. He had to admit they’d done it well! 

He swung round as he heard the laughter from the doorway, planting his hands on his hips, intending to glare at the attack on his precious coffee machine, but seeing the girls with tears running down their faces as they clutched each other helplessly, he found himself joining in, laughing with abandon.

He tugged Owen in for a surprised hug, growling in his ear “…you’ll be scraping those stickers off my coffee machine later today and putting all my stock back in the tourist office before you go home tonight, right…unless you want decaf for a week!” before releasing him, grinning.

Jack shooed them all out of the kitchen as Ianto turned his attention to the graffitied coffee machine. He pulled the Welshman into his arms and planted a soft kiss on his lips. “That wasn’t so bad..?” he murmured.

Ianto chuckled, “…nah, I think the Tea Dragon got off quite lightly…though I have threatened Owen with decaf if he doesn’t put everything back..!” 

Jack laughed, pressing in for another kiss that rapidly got hotter until they broke apart gasping for air. Releasing him, Jack wound his arms round him from behind, holding him close, as Ianto ground beans and sorted out mugs. As the coffee filtered the young man reflected on his lot in life…he had a job he loved, a man he adored and he felt the sensation of well-being and renewed life flowing through him…he may not be a magic Tea Dragon, but he was certainly a very happy teaboy…

End

 

 

  



End file.
